Lemme aks you summthin

There was a lot of talk about the "the black vote" being the weight that carried Proposition 8 through in California last November. African Americans, who vote Democratic in many instances, took a departure from the Democratic platform on the topic of gay marriage. (According to Wikipedia, 70% voted for the measure to put the clause, "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California," into the state constitution.) That is why I want to tell you a story that goes against the cliché of homophobic African Americans.

This morning, while having my car towed, I got to talking with one of the tow truck drivers, who was a gregarious and funny middle-aged black man.
He was flirting with me in a harmless way, saying, "You got a boyfriend? Cuz, say, you cute."

The towing turned into a visit to the mechanics at his garage, giving us ample opportunity to chat. He told me about the neighborhood, serving in the marines, busting his knee cap, getting to know a few Amish people on a trip hauling electrical equiptment to Chicago last week ("I respect 'em. That's a modest way a life."), and everything in between.

Toward the end of our encounter, he said, "Let me aks you one more thing. You tell me now if I make you uncomftable. You don't hafta answer."
For a second I wondered if he was going to ask me to comment on being a white woman spending the morning with two black men.

"You know earlier I aks you if you have a boyfriend and you says no?"

"Yeah..." Then I was sure he was just going to ask for my phone number - and sorely disappointed. I never expected what came next:

"You got a girlfriend?"

I said, "No, sir, I don't, but I am glad you asked me that." It is the first time in my life I have ever been asked.

"You never know nowadays. My daughter's gay. My ex-wife, too. But it don't bother me one bit."

The other tow truck driver weighed in critically: "Yeah, I know some girls they that way, and I aks em sometimes what make em like that, and they say, 'I bin hurt by too many guys,' but I think, women's capable a hurtin, too."

This opened the door for my conversation partner to respond with eloquent disagreement: "Yeah I hear ya man, but ain't nobody made em like that, that's just nature." Then he looked back at me: "You ain't angry a'me for aksin' are ya?"

"No, not at all," I said, wishing I could let him know how much I admired his candid style. "I respect you for asking me that."

"Ahright. Cuz I wouldn'ta thought any diffrently of ya if you'd a said yes."