THE MONICA SONG - now available in English!

(Translated from the original German. See copyright information at the end.)

Monica, hey,
oh had you stayed,
on 'til today,
as an intern in Washington.
and had you fancied to
rendezvous with "W" -
then lickety split, (Wahoo!)
he'd finally be ...on the run.

Because voters are consistent
and not the least indifferent
on the topic of the instant:
moral values and what God allows.
The head-of-state has a green light
to wage some wars, tell a few lies,
and break all diplomatic ties,
if he never breaks his wedding vows.

That set of skirmishes way over in the Gulf States
generates destruction and big deficits,
and yet not the man's impeachment.
There's no fancy out of bounds 'cept - God forbid - he fool around
Modus operandi : "Make war, not love!"
The Prez's Day of Reckoning won't come to be
until he is suspected of adultery.

***

The people'd call out, "Shame on
you. You are a traitor!"
and "Confess at once!" "Betrayal!"
"Our trust in you has hit a low."
Then every detail of the romance
would find its way into the news stands
and from there into the hands
of every gossip, critic, and talk show host.

Then we'd see Ken Starr on replay,
mudslingers in their heyday.
And Iraq and - even - Al Queda,
'd fade from news to history.
We'd see Bush would feel compelled
to hang his head, throw in his towel.
And just think how very swell:
we would all breathe so much easier!

Monica, in your hands you hold the trump card.
The choice is not hard.
The time has come to send him back to Houston.*
I know he may not be your type. But if you say,
"I'll do it if your price is right."
You would get ...
... a flood of contributions!

***

"Fuck Bush," that's what you see,
expressed so candidly,
from Berlin down to Paris,
sprayed on buildings, in alleyways.
I won't say that's in good taste.
I wouldn't say it to his face.
Still I'm begging you, make haste,
Monica, do it anyways.

German lyrics copyright Bodo Wartke 2005. To see the original, go to www.bodowartke.de, then 1. Click on 'Zum Lesen' on the lefthand side, 2. For the second albumn from the top (Live in Berlin) click on 'Titelliste aufrufen,' and 3. Go to track number 28 and click on 'Text anzeigen.' Then learn German!
To hear the melody of the song, look at his performance broadcast on YouTube.

*The capital of Texas is actually Austin, but nevermind.